The complex dynamics of a family’s various personalities, communication styles and temperaments are hard to equate to anything else. And yet, metaphors abound. A family can be described as anything – a car, a computer, a business - anything with multiple parts that interact with and rely on one another to be successful and remain functional as a whole. My favorite metaphor for families is being a team. Almost everyone is exposed to teams. It is something everyone has an exper

When I became a parent I thought I had a lot of experience with "parenting." I mean I was already an aunt to five, an auntie to about seven and for close to ten years I had done what I on occasion referred to as "clinical mommying" as a Clinical Social Worker working with children. I of course had some worries, but overall I thought I would have this parenting thing down . . . soooo, um, yeah. If you are a parent reading this you can just go ahead and have yourself a good lo

All children want to do well, even if their behavior makes you think the complete opposite. Even if you feel more frustrated and exasperated with them than you ever thought you could possibly feel. Kids want to please the adults in their lives. I have long purported the power of praise. I believe that all kids need it -- those with mild to minimal behavioral difficulties need it, and those with significantly challenging behavior need it. Be they younger or older, children nee

This morning I sat on my couch at 5:45am next to my child who had woken up 15 minutes earlier full of joy and energy. As I drank my coffee, wishing it was an IV drip of caffeine, I began thinking about my younger self. I thought about how I complained of being tired, stressed and at times overwhelmed in my early twenties and thirties. And truly, I was all of those things. I would never say that my own feelings or those of anyone else’s aren’t valid or true. At that time they

I recently read this on a Facebook parenting group: “I've been really feeling like the bar is just too damn high. Not that I'm even shooting for the bar, but it feels so far from reality that it's overwhelming.” Not too long before I read that post I spoke with a parent who I think is amazing. She has a hard time thinking of herself that way. The day we met she shared a funny thing that her son, who is on the Autism spectrum, said to her. In sharing this story she made a sarc